Monday, August 17, 2009
Last Pre-Davis Post!
Wow! Tomorrow I'll be a mommy. I feel like I'm in a total surreal state right now and I'm not too sure what I'm doing. We had our last doctor's appointment this morning and everything is still as scheduled. Arrive at the hospital in the morning at 5a.m. UG!! But I'm sure knowing me, it's not like I'll be sleeping too much anyway, awake with anticipation. I feel like a kid at Christmas time right now. Yesterday was a little hard for me actually. I had a flood of emotions that took over and just completely had a meltdown for a little bit. One minute, Michael is massaging my pinched nerve in my back and the next minute, I run into the bathroom trying to hold back my tears. Michael came in to hold me and I just told him I'm getting so scared...I'm so nervous. Thank goodness he was with me, otherwise I think I would have spent the day crying. He has such an amazing way of calming me down. I can't even begin to explain everything that I was thinking yesterday. Thoughts of, 'my goodness, this is going to be painful!' and wondering how things will change between Michael and I. Not knowing and not having any control over a situation is so hard for me, I'll admit! At the same time, it's exciting not knowing too. I can't wait to see his little face, wondering how he'll look like Michael and I. It excites me and fascinates me knowing we created this life together. I'm going to be a mom, I'm going to be a mom! For some reason, it's still shocking for me, even though I've had plenty of time to let this thought sink in. I can't wait for my life to change for the better and I am so extactic for this. Happy early birthday my little Davis. I can't wait to meet you tomorrow! I love you!